What an important book this is. Our stories are different yet exactly the same. Any lesbian will identify. At first, I thought that younger lesbians will feel less alone, less shame and less held back by their lesbianism. But, in truth, I don’t think so. Unlike other folk who are ‘othered’ – black, brown – they are born into a family that look the same, are the same. Lesbians are always different, always alone in their first families. Intentionally or otherwise, we feel ashamed of ourselves. We are alone. Of course, later we find our lesbian families and allies but the damage is done.
Your book perfectly describes the lesbian condition. All of us spend at least some time in the ‘closet’. Some a lifetime, some 20 years (like you) for me it was 10 years. No matter how young we ‘come out’, we feel it the same. It manifests in different ways but its damaging effect is just the same.
You have helped me realise I also need to find a way to get it out. To expel it. To come to terms with it. To find me, the unashamed child. As you have managed to do.
Fuck. Fuckety Fuck.
When I finished your book this morning, I cried.
Thank you so much for writing it, Sue. Do try to get it into more hands – I think it will change worlds.
sue orton | gathering threads 